Stunning Announcement from Middletown Shocks SCC

In a shocking announcement Xavier High School of Middletown has made two formal requests about their future football games. Xavier has sent these documents to in regards to asking to play all their games at Palmer Field.
The first request was sent to Mike Savage and the CIAC Board of Directors. Xavier sites the fact their success at Palmer is clearly not explainable. Since 2004 they are 20-1 with their last loss coming to the hands of Shelton late in 2006. Last year they were a mediocre 5-5 but won all games at Palmer Field.
The second request was sent to the Vatican in Rome. Xavier is clearly using the fact they are a private Catholic school to their advantage. The Xavier athletic department went on to tell Pope Benedict that when teams play at Palmer the opposition has touchdowns called back due to penalties, numerous holding penalties away from the point of attack, and scoring drives that are made impossible because yellow penalty flags are always flying. Xavier has no explanation for it. The opponents from Xavier have no answer either as they are always unable to see the infractions on film. Xavier has included to Pope Benedict that since there is no explanation to the excessive penalties thus it must be "Divine Intervention". A spokesman from the Vatican told us that they are taking a serious look into the theory. You can bet all of the rest of the SCC will take a deep breath and wait for a ruling........